Bags are Packed….

Here I am, in my sunny apartment waiting on the movers.

The last few weeks have flown by, with guests, and packing and meeting friends.

Last night, some of my lovely gayboy friends came by to help me carry the 10 boxes down to the first floor.  As both of my colleagues are away on holidays, one in Japan and one in Africa, I’ve been working from home all week. Which has been ace, actually.

I can get up and work in PJ’s from 9-12.30, then jump in the shower and run around to the local Boterham store (if you are in Amsterdam you should check this place out, get a yummy fresh made sandwich and fresh OJ and sit along the canal and eat watching the boats!) Then with boterham in hand back to the house and make a cuppa and chill for a bit. Run through another couple hours emails and orders with the sun streaming in the windows behind me, then go out for a beertje and a chat with whomever is around. Having the laptop in the house has been great as I can check emails from LA around 8pm ish and make sure all is in hand, thus saving waiting another 24hrs for an answer.

Yesterday I cycled to the Geemete to de-register in the city, I went down to where I registered and was stared at and handed a sheet. I expected nothing less as they are really rude in that office, true disgruntled civil service that are the same no matter what country you are in. So I cycled then to the town hall to hand in the forms. What a difference, big smiles, nice chat, I mentioned this to a Dutch mate last night and he was just as shocked as I, “What? a NICE person in the civil service?? How did you find her??”  LOL. So there you go .. as of 21st September I will officially no longer be a resident in AMS

How do I start to tell you how I feel about that? Hmmm…

I do love Amsterdam, even a lot of the things that bugged the hell out of me at first, I now like. Like waiting 20mins until the waitress can be bothered to acknowledge your existence when you are dying for a beer, I now carry a book or ipod and just chill. Not getting anything up to 5cent change back when you buy something, I now pay by pin or realise that its great not having a heap of 5cents in your change jar.

I really love my friends here, I know that sounds like a stupid thing to say, I mean who doesn’t like their friends? But really I have been so incredibly lucky to have met almost the most incredibly fantastic people. At least 20 of which I know I could call real true, call them in the middle of the night, persuade them to call in sick and go off traipsing somewhere, will sit with you for hours in a hospital kind of people!

I am really happy with what I’ve gotten out of my time here, I know I can go out  into the world and Create a life for myself, Create a community,  Create a professional identity in a huge corporation, Create a Home I love.  Without the back up of, oh you must be so and so’s daughter or cousin or workmate or whatever. I turned 30 here and I do think I really went from kid to adult in the 18 months I’ve been here.

In truth I think it was that change in me, the time to really assess what it is I want that has brought me to this decision. I know I can make the big decisions and I know I have the balls to make them work for me. The truth is that although I know I could stay here for years and make a life here, my life is too important to waste on a job I don’t love, that I don’t think makes anything of my talents.

All that noble stuff said, I’m CACKING myself.

I was crap at Uni the first time. I hated it; hated the place, the people, the crap weather, the lack of money, the living in some-one’s garage in Limerick!

To think that this time 3 weeks I’ll be in a classroom full of impressionable kids, with my fantastically calm and capable cousin as the teacher, FARK. Double pressure, if I screw up my whole family will know! I cant spell (as witnessed by all the wiggly red spell check lines as I look up) I am rubbish at maths, I cant say my name in Irish. I will be assisting a class of 8-12 year olds… chances are they’ll be teaching me!!

I’ve been behind a desk (allegedly) for 8 years…. 8years of half decent pay and 18 months of very decent pay. What am I doing walking away from that?? Nuts, that’s what I am.

I have (apart from a few hiccups) lived away from home from 1996 … I will be a bag lady sans abode for the next 9-12months. Part time with my mum in the midlands, part time with my gf in Dublin, and part time on the Dublin-Sligo commuter route! *groan* Looking round my lovely and incredibly empty apartment, yes I do believe I am crazy!

Still somewhere in there I do believe that I am doing the right thing….. *fingers crossed*